Are you one of those people who thinks that Valentine Day is a silly idea OR one of those people who looks forward to it every year?
Valentine’s day could be the perfect time to explore deeper intimacy whether you are from one camp or the other.
Why? What you are truly looking for in a romantic relationship, or any other meaningful relationship, is connection. Connection is the foundation for trust within a relationship and trust allows for intimacy and all the sweet feelings that you are yearning for that often die after we have been with someone for more than three months: this is called the ‘famous infatuation period’.There are many reasons why we lose the sweet feelings of infatuation and one of them is losing trust in our partner which takes away the intimacy and the butterflies we feel when first fall for someone.We start to lose trust in our partner when we feel that what we are trying to communicate is not being listened to or when we are afraid of speaking our truth for fear of rejection which isolates us and since we cannot even trust ourselves to say what’s really on our mind, how do we know that the other is?
Trust in our partner grows with time when we manage to face challenges together and come to a resolution. How can Valentine’s day be such a moment?Are you worried that if you don’t take the ‘V day’ into account that your romantic partner will be offended deep down even though they say that it does not matter? Or maybe you would really want some romance on that day but your partner does not see it as important because for them they would ‘rather love you all year long and they don’t need A day’ for that?Discussing how you really feel about it AND listening to what they think to make sure that both of you are heard and made to feel as important with your point of view is one of these opportunities to grow more in trust and intimacy. Wouldn’t that be amazing?
So go ahead, if both of you love the idea of Valentine’s day, then make it a special time to reconnect and bring in some romance. If one of you is in and the other one not, use it as a way to learn to negotiate it in a loving manner that actually brings you closer together.
To find out more about how you can create a more consciously loving relationships by visiting my website: drlisejanelle.com
Love + Light,